18 April 2006

The horror. The horror!

I'm so damn The current mood of augustdreams at www.imood.com

Yaaaay! Thank you very much for the birthday cards that were lurking in my snail mailbox today. You made my day.

Alas. I am working on the 20th. But the restaurant promises free Sundaes on your birthday and I fully intend to cash in. And also to annoy everyone with announcements of it being my birthday which legally entitles me to demand that co-workers retrieve for my use sour-candy-filled gumballs from the machine in our entryway. Thus ensuring that next year, they'll have the good sense to give me the day off.

In other news, don't ever try and treat abdominal pain with icyhot. The Endometriosis has seen fit to give me bladder adhesions which hurt slightly less than ramming a cattle prod up my nether regions. I don't get paid until Friday so can't afford my pain meds. So I figured... hey, icyhot! First it's cool to numb the pain, then hot to soothe it away! Yeah. That is a vile, contemptible LIE! First it is cool to lull you into a false sense of security. THEN it feels like you've coated yourself in wasabi and lit it on fire. Causing you to panic and try to wipe it all off with a cold washcloth. Which doesn't work, by the way. To remove it completely, I would suggest a good exorcist. If not, you'll have to use my method. Which was scrubbing it off in the shower and wondering why, two hours later, the burning and vague scent of vapo-rub and brimstone still lingers in the air.

Have a great day and thanks for reading.

P.S. If anyone wishes to buy me a birthday present, I want one of these:

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