February 07, 2003

Liar, liar, mascara on fire!

I'm so damn

Anyone watch that special interview with Michael Jackson? Damn. I almost fell out of my chair when he claimed that he hadn't had any plastic surgery except for two nose jobs. *snicker* These, he said, enable him to breathe better. The hell? My asshole isn't as narrow as that guy's nostrils! I don't know how he manages to breathe at all. When confronted with the fact that his entire facial structure has changed, he says "That's called puberty. I was growing and changing." Puberty?! Dude. You're fucking 44 years old. Naturally, he also doesn't find it at all peculiar that he is now a white guy. Yeah. That's perfectly normal. Hell, until I was 11 years old, I was Chinese!

If you want to get massive reconstructive plastic surgery and have lipstick and eyeliner tattooed onto yourself, that's fine. It's your perogative. But at least have the cojones to own up to it. Don't claim you've just magically changed appearance. The face fairy did not show up in Michael's room one night and grant him his bizarre wish to look like his sister.

The worst part of the interview was the scenes with his children. They can't go out in public without wearing these big, mardi-gras masks. Sad. The fact that anonymous women have basically sold this guy children makes me sick. Off to work with me! Have a great weekend and thanks for reading.

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